Dear Boys and Girls of Ritaville,
I am sorry. I have failed you.
Like Tiger Woods did in his press conference after Elin beat his ass with the golf club, I want to say to each of you, simply and directly, I am deeply sorry for my irresponsible and selfish behavior.
I have let you down. I have been neglecting the Bump It Brigade.
I make my solemn promise to you, my readers, that I will try my best to correct my shortcomings.
PS: Here are some of these beautiful works of hair art that have just been living in my email box due to my careless actions. Welcome back to the party ladies! You have been missed.